Star Trek - Movies

Overall movies averages:

 Movie reviews:

Movie: Star Trek I - The motion picture

Production number: #001

Release date: December 7th 1979

Crew: TOS

Review date: September 24th 2006

Review in crew evaluation style:

Spock has hippie hair... That reminds me of the episode "This side of paradise" (1x25) in which Spock is also on a hippie trip...

Scotty is in stage 2 of 3... Stage 1 was the TOS-stage, stage 2 is the all-grown-up-plus-moustache-stage and the final stage is of course stage 3: fat-Scot.

Kirk is now admiral, but is captain again almost as soon as the movie starts... Wow...

Bones tries to imitate Santa in his first scene... Quite a shock! Poor kids... Grumpy Santa...

Chekov is fine too, he screams the worlds most famous Russian words: "Aaaaaaahh!!" when he burns his hand on the BBQ console. Bad Chekov, no eating on the bridge. Get back to your station and refrain from saying the word "vessel"...

The movie is quite slow, but not boring. In fact the whole concept behind Vger is quite interesting! This is, sofar, the first time I have awarded a 10 for originality or any other of the criteria for that matter.

Dialog: 7

Humour: 3

Originality: 10

Entertainment: 9

Overall: 7,25

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Movie: Star Trek II - The wrath of Khan

Production number: #002

Release date: June 4th 1982

Crew: TOS

Review date: September 24th 2006

Ah yes, Khan is still quite arrogant... He's not even hunting for girls, but STILL Khan and Kirk are fighting...

I hate Saavik. And Kirsty Alley in general. Shoo, get off my plain of existence..!

"Genesis" is an interesting concept. In real life terraforming is also a "hot topic"... Since space exploration is in its infancy, a good deal of terraforming remains speculative. Based on what we know of our own world it seems possible to affect the environment in a deliberate way in order to change it; however the feasibility of creating an unconstrained planetary biosphere that mimics Earth on another planet has yet to be verified. Mars is considered by many to be the most likely candidate for terraformation. Much study has gone into the possibility of heating the planet and altering its atmosphere, and NASA has even hosted debates on the subject. However, a host of obstacles stand between the present and an active terraforming effort on Mars or any other world. The long timescales and practicality of terraforming are the subject of debate. But I'm going off-topic...

Oh, Kirk now needs reading glasses! The ladykiller is getting old...

Chekov isn't doing all to good either... He is found in a closet... Pussy.

Oh, returning to Kirk... He needs some anger-management it seems. He's in a tough spot in this movie and might need a little rescue 911 of his own.

And Spock lies... So, all in all: a movie worth watching. 

Dialog: 7

Humour: 6

Originality: 9

Entertainment: 8

Overall: 7,25

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Movie: Star Trek III - The search for Spock

Production number: #003

Release date: June 1st 1984

Crew: TOS

Review date: September 24th 2006

Ah, well, good news to start out with... Kirsty Alley has been replaced by Robin Curtis as Saavik... Much better...

In this third Trek movie we discover that Kirk is a thief... and not just of hearts...

Ever wondered what Spock was like when he went through puberty? Well, then check out this flick... He is quite a sportsman. He event invented Klingon basketball, demonstrated in this movie. Kirk is also quite athletic and also takes up a Klingon-sport: Klingon football...

Also note that of the two planets Genesis and Vulcan, Genesis is more volcanic...

Good movie? Yeah... But quite Klingunfriendly...

Dialog: 7

Humour: 5

Originality: 8

Entertainment: 8

Overall: 7,00

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Movie: Star Trek IV - The voyage home

Production number: #004

Release date: November 26th 1986

Crew: TOS

Review date: September 27th 2006

This is a timetravel movie... As some of you might know, the idea of time-travel is just a bit too 'easy' for me... Sure, makes a nice scifi movie, but it's so ridden with paradoxes and controversy that I wouldn't have used it myself. Despite the fact that time-travel is at the base of this movie, it's by no means a bad movie.

Especially the loads of humour make up a lot. Putting a crew in a city in the past creates a goldmine of possible funny situations, and we get to see loads of them. The use of time-travel cuts some points from the originality perhaps, but 8 solid points for humour is most definately well-deserved and makes up for lost points...

Oh, and finally, someone agrees with me on Checkov being a retard...

BAD: How can the court be viewing video images of the destruction of the Enterprise filmed from several angles outside of the ship?

Dialog: 6

Humour: 8

Originality: 7

Entertainment: 8

Overall: 7,25

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Movie: Star Trek V - The final frontier

Production number: #005

Release date: June 9th 1989

Crew: TOS

Review date: September 28th 2006

Hmm, a laughing Vulcan... Should make you curious already... No? Perhaps Kirk, Bones en Spock singing the classic song "Row, row, row your boat"... Kirk jumped by a catwoman?

McCoy to Kirk: "Spock can no more kill his brother than he could kill you". I don't think that holds any significant weight, as Spock attempted to kill Kirk in the TOS episode "Amok time" (2x05) and to his knowledge succeeded in doing so. So, his brother could be toast.

Oh, and Kirk, Bones and Spock in a grouphug... But despite that, a very interesting movie too watch...

Dialog: 7

Humour: 7

Originality: 8

Entertainment: 8

Overall: 7,50

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Movie: Star Trek VI - The undiscovered country

Production number: #006

Release date: December 6th 1991

Crew: TOS

Review date: September 28th 2006

The first mention of Sulu's first name in the history of Star Trek... His first name is Hikaru, and Hikaru is now captain of the starship Excelsior, playing a prominent role in this movie.

Bones beats the shit outof a Klingon! Wooow! Bones! Perhaps I should point out the fact that the Klingon is already bathing in blood (which appears to be pink! Klingons have PINK blood!) and that the man is already dead... But nevertheless, nice going Bones...

Worf appears in this movies as... a lawyer, defending Kirk and McCoy... Loads of cellphones in that scene as well... How... modern.

Now, to discuss Spocks behaviour: Does an involuntary mindmeld consitute mindrape? I'll let you decide...

Dialog: 7

Humour: 5

Originality: 8

Entertainment: 8

Overall: 7,00

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Movie: Star Trek VII - Generations

Production number: #007

Release date: November 18th 1994

Crew: TOS & TNG

Review date: September 28th 2006

This is the movie that mixes TOS and TNG with a little pinch of VOY...

Kirk is camera-shy when being interviewed on the third Enterprise.

Tim Russ is in the movie aswell, but without pointed ears... but as a human lieutenant. Less then a year later he grew pointed ears, started talking funny without ever being funny and starred on the series Voyager as Tuvok...

After all of the violent shaking in the past, still no seatbelts have been installed on the Enterprise... Or will they be installed next tuesday?

Data is particularly amusing in this movie... But there's also a cooking lesson presented by your lovely hosts James T. Kirk and Jean Luc Picard broadcasting live from James' kitchen on Nexus TV.

Despite a sort of time travel component in the movie, this is most definately a movie worth your while...

Dialog: 7

Humour: 7

Originality: 8

Entertainment: 8

Overall: 7,50

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Movie: Star Trek VIII - First contact

Production number: #008

Release date: November 22nd 1996

Crew: TNG

Review date: September 28th 2006

EMH makes his movie debut... and starts using McCoy's way of speaking... Deanna is an alcoholic being hit on by mr. Cochrane. And Picard kills a crewmember.... Interesting... Reg goes Howling Mad when he meets an alcoholic. No, not Deanna or captain Kirk, another alchoholic. Data gets into contact with the Borg queen... In an unexpected way... Yuck... Picard picking a fight with Worf... Tommygun vs Borg... Interesting...

Loads of things going on, but again there's time travel... It's getting old... And don't tell me that the solution is time travel to solve that. There's also considerably less humour in this movie than the average Trek movie, which would have given it a better rating. But there's no such thing as a bad Trek movie.

Dialog: 7

Humour: 4

Originality: 7

Entertainment: 8

Overall: 6,50

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Movie: Star Trek IX - Insurrection

Production number: #009

Release date: December 11th 1998

Crew: TNG

Review date: September 28th 2006

Picard sings a duet with his enemy Data and initiates a dance with the 2 vessels... Interesting way to make a musical, I'd say...

Data goes for a swim, pretends to be a boat and gets lectured by a kid on an anti-shave planet.

Picard to Geordi (and Will): "Make the council see" and something about "turning a blind eye"... Not very nice to say something like that to someone who is blind as a bat (actually,  during this movie, he can actually see with his actual natural eyes, to make it more weird).

Dialog: 8

Humour: 7

Originality: 8

Entertainment: 8

Overall: 7,75

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Movie: Star Trek X - Nemesis

Production number: #010

Release date: December 13th 2002

Crew: TNG

Review date: September 29th 2006

Data continues the singing career he started in the previous movie... I can't say I promote it...

This movie seems to be about an 'attack of the clones' I guess...

The story isn't really that great, but at least the movie starts out with some good humour, which unfortunately is nowhere to be seen in the latter half of the movie. But there's probably more action in this movie than any other Trek movie, which makes up for it a bit... Loads of ship to ship and man to man combat.

BAD: Data asks Picard: "Would you like me to drive, sir?", while it's a flying machine they are in. Before people start yapping about that it's not actually flying but levitating or what the fuck ever: shut up.

Dialog: 7

Humour: 5

Originality: 8

Entertainment: 7

Overall: 6,75

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Movie: Star Trek XI

Production number: #

Release date: 2008

Crew: TOS with new actors?

Review date: Not released yet...

Not released yet...

IMDB info

Discuss this movie on the forum

Dialog: 0

Humour: 0

Originality: 0

Entertainment: 0

Overall: 0,00

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